Helpless
by Miss Dusk
Summary: Erik is brooding about life... what a surprise. This is a short song fic that I couldn't resist writing.


Helpless

A/N: Just wanted to say that this song is an Oingo Boingo song and I couldn't resist the opportunity to use this along with the POTO fan fiction world. If you don't know the song, I know there is a clip on YouTube that uses it but you have to be 18 or older to watch it.

Erik was brooding, he was staring at the stone wall that held him under the Opera House. He had just got back from the cemetary. He had once again tried to get Christine to come to him, to be able to claim her as his own would make his life complete.

It once again had been a failure. He sat in a chair, with a glass of wine balancing on the arm. What had he done wrong? Was he doomed to fail no matter what he did? Was there any point in trying to get the beautiful, young soprano to love him?

So many questions danced through his head, soon Erik could feel them starting to do a warped waltz banging into his skull as they twirled around. He could even hear the waltz beginning to play, taunting him to write the words down. To play them to ease his suffering.

_Countless long nights  
While I stare at the wall  
I ask myself over again... _

How did I end up  
In this little hell?  
How - did it ever begin?

Erik was never a person that liked to dwell on the past before. He knew that his past hurt, it hurt more than most people. He was born an outcast. He never even had a fighting chance to prove his worth to the world. Instantly, he was claimed to be evil, a monster…

_Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess _

Helpless to turn back the clock  
That ticks on  
With its cruel shiny face  
It laughs while it watches  
My every disgrace - I was  
Born a sap - all the  
Nurses laughed when they  
Saw me the first time  
They giggled and they said  
This poor little monster'd be  
Better off dead.

Erik's eyes began to burn. Why couldn't he have been a different person? Someone who was completely different from himself. Someone that everyone loved and admired and weren't afraid to admit it to the world, nevermind to themselves. Erik held his head in his hands as he thought of the infamous, "What if?"

_Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess _

Helplessly trapped in a body  
I'm sure -  
Should have never been mine.  
I bet that my real one's  
Doing just fine - and I  
Dont belong here, I  
Dont belong here - I  
Should be quite rich  
With a big shiny car  
A house with twelve rooms  
I deserve to go far.

If it hadn't been for Christine, Erik knew that he would have fallen down that pit of despair and never come out alive. He never wanted admit how the life at the circus really affected him. He tried his best not to think about it at all costs, but it was so hard not to.

Erik had spent so much time in the darkness that when he heard Christine, it had been too late. He never had enough contact to know how to behave when around a person, so he acted like the thing he knew how to be the most, a shadow, a ghost.

_Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess _

Helplessly falling in love  
But does love  
Really last through the night?  
To love - to honor -  
To kick and to bite! and I  
Dont belong here, I  
Dont belong here  
It's all a mistake  
I was destined for greatness  
A leader, a prophet -  
They're just too blind to notice.

Erik's hands began to tremble with rage, if he had been born without the imperfections on his face, he would undoubtedly be the most famous composer in France. It is even possible all of Europe. Then, and only then, could he with full confidence be able to woo Christine and take her away from her precious Raoul.

The thought of Raoul winning was bitter, the thought and taste of getting Christine back was sweet to Erik. To be able to take Christine from Raoul. It would be an outstanding accomplishment that only he could manage.

_Where did this whole silly story begin?  
It seems that my mind has gone -  
Blank.  
I think that I've messed up a chapter or two.  
Perhaps it is best if Im frank!_

As Erik took a sip from his wine glass, his eyes narrowed into slits at the thought of Raoul. The new investor of the Opera House didn't know who he was messing with. Raoul was lucky that he managed to survive today, but no less. Erik knew that Raoul's time would come, when he would meet the real monster that lay within Erik.

_Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess - _

Helplessly lost like that  
Poor chap who came  
For an innocent dance.  
He left with his brain smeared  
All over his pants! cause he  
Didnt belong here, he  
Didnt belong here  
He never should've left  
That warm cage in a zoo!  
His face was so ugly  
What else could I do?  
Can you - really blame me,I  
Had to smash it.  
He left me no choice,  
He was just like the others.  
I just had to kill him.  
Like my poor, dear, old  
Mother.

Yes, it was the only way. The only way to get Christine and Raoul at the same time. Surely, she would save her lover's life by staying with him for the rest of her life. She would never say no to Erik, if he threatened to kill Raoul. It was the perfect plan, Erik wasn't going to sit around and _let_ Raoul just take Christine away from him. No, no, there was going to be a fight for her. And Erik had a pretty strong guess who was going to win this time.

_Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess _

Helplessly fucked in the ass  
By a legion of forty ex-cons  
Thats what it feels like  
When you walk all over me.  
Dont belong here, I  
Dont belong here  
Your eyes burn right through me.  
They fill me with fear.  
I couldve been at home  
Watching the opera, and drinking wine.

Oh, oh, oh oh oh helpess, so helpless.

Erik stood from his chair. Abandoning his thoughts of being lonely until the end due to his face. He quickly grabbed his cloak and went up to the upstairs of the Opera House to set his plan into action.

_No more_, Erik thought, _No longer am I going to be helpless_.

* * *

The real line of the song is "Watching football, and drinking beer" but I just couldn't see that fitting Erik or the time period so I changed it for my sanity. 

Feel free to tell me what you think? Was I too choppy? Was I just right? I don't know until you guys tell me. ;) Thank you for your feedback.


End file.
